Website of the day

Psych Central

and to add insult to injury...

there's a nail in the front offside tyre of my car. Sodding typical.

Bloody annoyed!

Yesterday, the electricity went off. AGAIN. It does this intermittently, and the supply company keep telling us that it is a 'transient fault' and that they can't fix it until the cable actually burns out, so that they can find the break.

Anyway, my neighbour, Vince, told me that the power had gone off at 10:30am, and that he'd rung them and was told that it would be past midnight when it would be fixed because (hurrah!) the cable had burned out and they could finally fix it properly by replacing the cable.

So, given that I'd already decided to stay at Spike's last night, I went round the house turning everything off, including the central heating.

When I got home from work this evening, I opened the front door to be met my a pyroclastic blast of heat. WTF??? The heating was on. I checked the timer and it was set to permanent 'on'. I swear I set it to permanent 'off'. I really did - honest! I assume that the break in the electricity supply had returned it to a default setting of 'on'.

So, having spent most of the winter with the heating off, and me wrapped in a duvet because I couldn't afford the gas bill, my heating was on for 19 hours on a warm day and I wasn't even in the bloody house to reap the benefit.

However, having been home for four hours now, with the heating off, I can honestly say that my new loft and cavity wall insulation works, cos it's still like a bloody sauna in here. Actually, I'm sat on the sofa in just a t-shirt, cos it really is that warm. Don't worry folks, the curtains are closed :o)

Earth movement?

Never mind bloody earth movement, I nearly had a bowel movement!

5.3 on the Richter Scale, 0 on the Smurf scale. Yep, apparently he slept right through it, but this is hardly surprising for a man who slept through a fire alarm at the TT....

How do you define fat?

There seems to be so many ways now, of people telling us that we're fat, obese, whatever, but which way is the best?

According to Diabetes UK, if you are a woman and your waist is larger than 31.5", or a man with a waist of over 37" then you are at risk of diabetes. That's me fucked then - my waist is 38", or 36" when I lay off eating bread (and no, I'm not gluten intolerant).

When I was about 20 years old, my waist was 34" and people used to say to me "Oh my God! You're too skinny, are you anorexic?" How come? Well, I'm 5'11" tall for a start. 34" was actually about right for me. If my waist was as low as 31.5", given my build, I think my dad would start to panic that I was seriously ill, just like he did when I was in my mid to late teens.

How can an organisation make a sweeping generalisation such as waist size to determine someone's health? If I were 4'11" then yes, I might be worried if my waist was over 31.5", but at 5'11", then it's a different matter.

OK, so I am ignoring the waist size thing. How about BMI? Well, yes, I'm in the overweight category at 28.7, but how much of my weight is owing to muscle and how much is owing to fat? According to my body fat report, I score 29% - the 'healthy range' is from 21 to 33. So, one report says I'm obese, one says I'm borderline overweight and another says I'm healthy.

Great, so who is right? Should I be paranoid, or satisfied? Actually, I'm neither. I'm not happy. I've tried to lose weight for the past 5 years or so, with no success. I don't eat much junk food, although I admit to scoffing a bag of pork scratchings, a bag of crisps and half a box of After Eight mints at the weekend, but hell, once in a while you've got to let go, haven't you? According to my food diary, I have been eating fewer than 1400 calories per day for the past 8 months (the recommended guideline is 2,000 for women and 2,500 for men) , and I have lost a whole 2lbs. I exercise more, eat less and my weight doesn't change.

I give up.

I'd just like to say...

that I really couldn't give a shit about the Oscars, or 'Arsekars' as they now appear to pronounce them.

I couldn't give a stuff what fashion disasters people are wearing this year, nor could I give a stuff about whose party is the best, or which luvvie wants to thank his or her mother, dog walker or toilet seat-warmer.

It's all self-congratulatory bollocks. Get a life and stop clogging up the news reports with it. It's not news, it's boring and tacky and I have better things to do than listen to or watch it.

School 1960 vs. School 2007

Scenario: Johnny and Mark get into a fistfight after school.

1960 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up mates.
2007 - Police are called, Armed Response Unit arrives and arrests Johnny and Mark. Mobiles with video of fight confiscated as evidence. They are charged with assault, ASBOs are taken out and both are suspended even though Johnny started it. Diversionary conferences and parent meetings conducted. Video shown on 6 internet sites.

Scenario: Jeffrey won't sit still in class, disrupts other students.

1960 - Jeffrey is sent to the principal's office and given 6 of the best. Returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.
2007 - Jeffrey is given huge doses of Ritalin. Counselled to death. Becomes azombie. Tested for ADD. School gets extra funding because Jeffrey has adisability. Drops out of school.

Scenario: Billy breaks a window in his neighbour's car and his Dad gives him the slipper.

1960 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.
2007 - Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy is removed to foster care and joins a gang. Psychologist tells Billy's sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison. Billy's mum has an affairwith the psychologist. Psychologist gets a promotion.

Scenario: Mark, a college student, brings cigarettes to school .

1960 - Mark shares a smoke with the school principal out on the smoking area.
2007 - Police are called and Mark is expelled from School for drug possession. His car is searched for drugs and weapons.

Scenario: Mohammed fails high school English.

1960 - Mohammed retakes his exam, passes and goes to college.
2007 - Mohammed's cause is taken up by local human rights group. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that making English a requirement for graduation is racist. Civil Liberties Association files class action lawsuitagainst state school system and his English teacher. English is banned from core curriculum. Mohammed is given his qualification anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.

Scenario: Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers, puts them in a model plane paint bottle and blows up an anthill.

1960 - Ants die.
2007 - MI5 and police are called and Johnny is charged with perpertrating acts of terrorism. Teams investigate parents, siblings are removed from the home, computers are confiscated, and Johnny's dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.

Scenario: Johnny falls during break and scrapes his knee. His teacher, Mary, finds him crying, and gives him a hug to comfort him.

1960 - Johnny soon feels better and goes back to playing.
2007 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces three years in prison. Johnny undergoes five years of therapy. Becomes gay.

Back to Basics

I was listening to BBC Radio Manchester this morning; they had the Chief Constable of Greater Manchester (Michael Todd) on, talking about youth nuisance, such as kids being drunk, noisy and abusive.

A listener commented that the Police rarely arrest the kids or take them home, they just move them on elsewhere.

Why on earth can't they chuck them in the drunk tank and keep them there until their parents/guardians come to collect them? They'd soon pack it in if that happened. I know that if that had ever happened to me, I'd have been grounded indefinitely.

Yes, I accept that, initially, there would be more drunks than there were places to hold them, but once they realised that it wasn't just a threat, it was a reality, they would soon learn not to do it.

The problems with some of today's youf is that they think that they are untouchable. Nanny do-gooders invented human rights and now, instead of coming down on these brats like a ton of bricks, they just simper and ask them nicely to stop it. Time to get tough, stop being nice and bring back some old fashioned policing.

Pipex - DNS change

I couldn't get online at all on Monday, so I rang Pipex but their helpdesk closes at 9pm and I was 5 minutes too late. I rang my mate, who is also on Pipex, but she could get online and was OK. She checked the website and it said that there were no service outages.

I rang Pipex from work the following morning and the girl suggested that my firewall was blocking access. I knew it wasn't, because it worked perfectly before, and firewalls don't suddenly reconfigure themselves.

When I got home from work on Tuesday, I still couldn't get online, and rang them again. After being on hold for 17 minutes, at 10p per minute, I got through to a very pleasant chap who started on the standard script of reboot this, unplug that. I stopped him and said I'd already tried all of that, and that the problem was that the DNS was not able to resolve IP addresses. "Ah!" says he. It turns out that they changed the DNS at the weekend, and he gave me the new numbers, and bingo! it worked.

Surely it is not beyond the wit of man to realise that if the ISP was changing the DNS, that they could have e-mailed all of their customers to tell them of the change, rather than just cutting everyone off? Surely they could have put something on their website, so that people logging in from work, like I did, would know about the change and not have to spend ages on the phone trying to sort it out? Or perhaps they just wanted everyone to ring in and pay their 10p a minute to boost their coffers?

Goth Events

Do you want to know what's on in the world of Goth music? Do you want to publicise your event? Worry not, help is at hand in the form of GothEvent.com, a brand-spanking new site just for event listings. Go on, go and have a look - what are you waiting for?

City of Culture?

So, Liverpool is set to be the European Capital of Culture for 2008, is it? I beg to differ.

A fortnight ago, Spike & I went into the city centre, my first ever shopping trip to Liverpool, and quite possibly my last.

The first thing we did was to go to the bakery and get a pasty and a doughnut each. We were standing next to the Radio City box office in the St. John's shopping centre, just opposite the bakery, quite happily munching away and watching the world go by, when a small grumpy woman barged past me, carrying some sandwich wrappers. She dumped them in the bin and then glared at us and snapped "I suppose that lot was yours!". "Erm, no", I replied, stunned at how rude she was. I pointed out that I'd put my wrapper in the bin and that I was still eating my doughnut. "Well YOU'RE standing there", she snapped. I have never felt my anger rise so quickly. I had the urge to slap her, but managed to restrain myself. I repeated that the litter wasn't mine, but she just glared at me and unlocked the door to the booth and went inside, so I called her a silly cow and left.

Radio City - if this woman is an employee of yours, I commend her for her attitude towards litter, but her attitude & behaviour towards complete strangers is disgusting. I had never been to Liverpool before, and if that woman is an example of how your employees and fellow citizens treat visitors, I will never visit again. She ruined our day. You may think this is petty anger, but given that persuading Spike to leave the house is a challenge in itself, only for some stupid woman to upset us both by falsely accusing us of leaving litter, was just the topping on the cake. His recovery has been set back as a direct result of your actions, and I have never felt so insulted.

We ended up going straight home, having lost all enthusiasm for our day out. If that woman is an example of how you're promoting your 'City of Culture', you can stuff it. I have no desire to return to Liverpool.

Long time, no blog

OK, I've been busy. Very busy. Not really had time to fart recently, although Spike would probably claim that that is untrue.

Engrish

WTF ???



Lots more at Engrish.com

The name thing explained

Thanks to Pea for giving me the link to this BBC news article, explaining why some people think one shouldn't name a teddy bear after a Prophet, and why some people think it's not a big issue.

Interestingly enough, it says that the Islamic Society used to sell a teddy bear named after another Prophet, Adam the Prayer Bear.

Just a thought

If it's blasphemy to call a teddy bear 'Muhammad', why is it OK to call your child 'Muhammad' then? This isn't intended to be a criticism, it's a genuine question.

Yes, I know it's an insult to make an image of the prophet, but a teddy bear is a teddy bear. It's not an image of anything other than a bear.

Why has the teacher been arrested? It was the kids who chose the name. Surely, if it's so wrong, their parents are the ones who didn't educate them properly?

Thai Boxing Fights - 2 December 2007

It's gone too far

I had to double-check the date today, to make sure it wasn't 1 April. I can't believe that the paranoia propagated by our Government has now gone as far as announcing that the bags of rail travellers are to be searched. Can you imagine the chaos that it will cause? The public transport system is already in meltdown, and now they want to make it even worse by causing unnecessary delays whilst they invade your privacy even further than they do now.

I resent being treated like a criminal. I have never, to the best of my knowledge, broken the law in my entire life, so why should I have to submit to being degraded in this manner? If they do insist on searching all bags at stations I will simply stop using public transport altogether and add to the congestion on the roads. As for congestion charging, if that's brought in, I just won't go to those areas where it is introduced. I don't need to go into the city centres.

Every time I read in the news about the latest 'insecurity measures' I can feel the bile rising. This country makes me sick. Day after day, we are shit upon from a great height, and we are expected to sit here and take it. I work my guts out to help people who need all sorts of problems resolving and are not able to do it themselves, and yet I can do absolutely nothing to help to preserve the sanity and freedom of ordinary people like me who are inconvenienced, accused and harrassed by the state, all for the sake of paranoia. I no longer have any confidence in this Government that I, to my shame, voted for and have worked for. I would love to be able to meet those responsible for these ludicrous ideas and plead with them to see how they are wrecking this fomerly wonderful country of ours. I weep for the hopelessness and helplessness of it all.

I hate the way this country has gone, and I really mean it. I have absolutely no patriotism left. I am sick and tired of the constant so-called 'anti-terrorism' measures which are absolutely nothing to do with terrorism at all, and everything to do with eroding the liberty of British subjects. This once-proud nation is now reduced to a police state, where the state can do whatever it wants and the ordinary law-abiding citizen is treated like dirt on the shoes of the powers that be.

The threat of terrorism is no worse now than it was 30 years ago, and the only thing that these latest announcements will do, is increase the resentment of ordinary people who just want to get on with their lives without unnecessary and unwanted interference from a bunch of overpaid people who appear to produce this rubbish in a misguided attempt to justify their salaries.

Please, stop this madness now!

Sick of it already

Bloody Xmas adverts on the telly. Xmas is not for another 6½ weeks, yet we're being bombarded with suggestions that we need to go into siege mode and stock up on chocolate and alcohol. Like I don't do that all year round anyway?

I'm sick of the marketing and the hype for what is, to be honest, a bloody boring day when most people eat themselves sick and then fall asleep in front of the telly. The earlier the marketing starts, the more I hate Xmas. The capitalists wreck it.

I am preparing to batten down the hatches already, and the first day I hear any Xmas music in the shops, will be the day I stop shopping for the rest of the year.

Bah! Humbug!

Ow ow ow ow

Spike and I did a five hour walk with Liverpool Council Ranger Service this afternoon, and my feet are killing me. Damn good walk though, and very interesting. The Ranger, Ronnie, gave us a very interesting talk on the big houses in the Calderstones area, and explained how some of them fell into ruin, and others were renovate by the Council.

Now, where can I get new feet?

RIP - Nana

My nana died last night, after a several years of suffering from dementia and being very frail.

In one way, I feel very sad. She was good to me as a kid, and I miss the person that she used to be. In another way, I'm glad, because she's no longer suffering.

Slob's rant

OK, so I don't have the monopoly on ranting. Slob's rant on poor driving is rather good. In fact, I reckon he's been taking lessons from me ;o) However, seeing as he probably still has that video of me venting my spleen at the Mabon Rally, I suppose I'd better just be nice to him...

Love you really!

Why can't religious 'leaders' keep their opinions to themselves?

The Archbishop of Canterbury, Rowan Williams, has also annoyed me today. I have to say that I usually think that Dr. Williams is pretty sensible, but it beggers belief that he thinks that the age of criminal responsibility should be raised.

Dr. Williams obviously doesn't know some of the little scrotes that live in my area. Believe me, 10 year-olds DO know right from wrong, but they also know that they'll get away with criminal activity because it's too much hard work for the justice system to deal with them. I'm not blaming the Police here - they do a great job, it's the rest of the system which is an arse.

I know one copper who wasted months chasing round after one particular little bastard, knowing that every time he caught him, the magistrates would let the little darling go because he was too young, or from a broken home, or because they didn't have room for him in the cells. The aforementioned copper was highly pissed off because every time they let the scrote out, he was off committing more crimes within the hour. It made a mockery of the law, and the copper was very disillusioned.

In the case of young children committing crimes, the parents should be made to take more responsibility, and the justice system should mete out punishments which drive it home to the kids that what they have done is wrong. If they scrawl graffiti on walls, they should be made to clean it off, if they break or damage something they should be made to replace it, or work until they have paid off the debt in kind.

This country is already too soft on juvenile criminals and it's about time that the do-gooders woke up and smelt the coffee.

More religious interference

The Bishop of Bolton is giving away apples as part of his campaign to re-brand Halloween.

Is he really? What a bigot!

How would he like it if people started a campaign to re-brand Christmas?

Instead of trying to demonise the beliefs of others, perhaps he should just mind his own business, get on with celebrating his own religion and let others get on with celebrating theirs.

Woof!

Seized Elton artwork not indecent

A month ago, the photograph, entitled 'Klara and Edda Bely Dancing' by American Nan Goldin, was seized by Police from Gateshead's Baltic gallery following concerns that it was child pornography.

Apparently it has now been decided that it is not indecent. So, what is this controversial picture? What caused the fuss? Well, here it is (censored). At least, I'm told this is it. I'm not sure I believe it.



My reaction? It's shite. I can't believe that anyone would pay money to purchase that picture, even if it was part of a set. If it was one which I had taken, I would have deleted it from the camera because it wasn't worth saving.

It's a couple of kids messing about in the kitchen. The lighting is poor, the setting is poor and I know kids who could have produced a better image on a disposable camera.

Is that really the picture in question? Surely this is someone taking the piss? Please tell me that the real photograph is actually a good one.

The only reason I can think of for anyone wanting that picture, is for the shock value. The photographer must have been laughing her tits off when she sold it. Money for old rope, in my opinion. If Elton John really does think it's a good photo, I have hundreds he can buy. I have a particularly good one of my feet, and another of my finger. The one I have from the end of the film, where there's only half a frame is not bad too. Very artistic I think. Sort of black and yellow and you can see the holes where the film locates on the spools. Must be worth a few bob, with the right marketing.

So, is it pornography? No, I don't think it is. There's nothing sexual about it, it's just a picture of a naked kid. Hell, my parents have naked photos of me as a young child. That doesn't make them perverts, and I have no problem with the existence of those pictures because I am not ashamed of my body, not then, not now.

There is, of course, the question of the child's right to privacy. Whilst it's perfectly normal for parents to take naked pictures of their kids, is it right that they should be allowed to publish them, when the child has no say in the matter, and isn't of an age or maturity to know the implications of publication? How will the child feel about this in 10 years time? How will her friends feel about it?

RSPCA breaks the law on releasing non-native species

In the UK, the grey squirrel is a non-native pest, which is a threat to the native red squirrel. Indeed, it is so much of a pest that if one is captured, it is illegal to release it.

So why did the RSPCA officer release this one? It should have been humanely dispatched. Surely the RSPCA Inspector should know the law?

Is it me?

I was rather amused to read this petition on the 10 Downing Street website.

So the person who wants to ban 'English Litrature' [sic] belives that 'The only requirement you need is to be competent in reading and writing."

Is it me?

The future is here!

According to this BBC report, the human species may split into two in about 100,000 years, into a "a genetic upper class and a dim-witted underclass".

It goes on to say "The descendants of the genetic upper class would be tall, slim, healthy, attractive, intelligent, and creative and a far cry from the "underclass" humans who would have evolved into dim-witted, ugly, squat goblin-like creatures."

Well, much as I like to read scientific research, I can't believe that Dr. Curry thinks it will be as far away as another 100,000 years. Has he never seen the chavs having around on the street corners, grunting at each other and communicating with wild hand-gestures? Has he not seen the drunken louts, staggering through the streets, urinating in corners and throwing up on the pavements and shouting at passers-by? Has he not seen them burberry-clad yobs, smashing bottles, trying to smoke two cigarettes at the same time, or the slapper tiny-teens pushing their prams around whilst swigging from bottles of booze?



















Sorry Dr. Curry, but the future is already here. There's even a whole website dedicated to the research of the subject of the new underclass.

What we need to know is, how can we reverse it? Won't somebody think of the children?

Stolen Bike Alert!

My mate's bike has been nicked in Leeds. If the person who nicked it is reading this, may I suggest that you leave it in a very safe place (perhaps even back where you found it) and notify the Police of its whereabouts, because people are out looking for you, even as I type. Hell hath no fury, etc. etc.

The bike:

Yamaha Virago, reg number G408 WBY

Blue in colour with leather cover on tank

has forward cruiser pegs which are quite unique

has highway hawk clock on barstop

silencer has no baffle in

has renntec sissy bar

RIP - Hilma Miles

Goodnight, Hilma, and sweet dreams always. We'll see you in Summerlands, if you can stop wandering for long enough!