This morning saw some of the worst driving I've seen in quite some time on my daily commute. Three cars completely ignored the red traffic light at the end of my road, as did a cyclist; two cars ignored the fact that it was my right of way at one of the chicanes and didn't even dare to look at me as they drove past, their stares fixed firmly ahead, hands gripping the steering wheel tightly. The 30mph maximum speed limit appears to have been re-assigned as a minimum speed limit and I have given up counting the number of people I see driving whilst using a mobile phone.
However, the best has got to be the teenage dickhead in the knackered white Fiesta who zoomed up behind me and then gesticulated angrily as I slowed down to 20mph (as per the speed limit sign) by the kiddies' play area in Chew Moor. Not happy with this delay to his journey, he then proceeded to overtake me in what sounded like first gear, despite the fact that I was overtaking parked cars on this already narrow road. He drove up onto the pavement and then bumped back down again, swerving to the left in order to avoid the oncoming bus and nearly hitting a parked car in the process. He then got held up by the three cars in front of me, who were also observing the 20mph limit. When we came to the blind left-hand bend, he decided to overtake those three cars too, and narrowly missed another oncoming vehicle. Not deterred, he then put his foot down and almost got the car on two wheels through the chicane. He decided not to go through the width restriction at Lostock Station and chose to take the other route. Imagine how pissed off he must have been when he got to the Beaumont Road traffic lights, then, to find himself behind me once again. I must admit, I did snigger just a little.
25 February 2011
16 December 2010
Pronunciation Rant
Right you lot, I'm fed up with you misusing and mispronouncing words and some of them really really annoy me. Let's start with this one: 'masseuse'. The word comes from the French 'masser' - to massage.
Firstly, please stop referring to a 'male masseuse'. A 'masseuse' has to be, by definition, a woman. The male version of the word is 'masseur'. Got that?
Now, can you pronounce the word 'masseur'? It's a bit like 'mass' and 'err', put together. Try it. I bet you knew that already.
OK, so let's try the other one, 'masseuse'. No, it's not 'mass - oose', that's an American term for 'I can't speak French so I'll make something up'), it's pronounced 'mass -errs', or in the IPA: ma-sœz.If you insist on using French words in your speech, at least make the effort to learn the correct pronunciation so you don't sound like a tit.
Firstly, please stop referring to a 'male masseuse'. A 'masseuse' has to be, by definition, a woman. The male version of the word is 'masseur'. Got that?
Now, can you pronounce the word 'masseur'? It's a bit like 'mass' and 'err', put together. Try it. I bet you knew that already.
OK, so let's try the other one, 'masseuse'. No, it's not 'mass - oose', that's an American term for 'I can't speak French so I'll make something up'), it's pronounced 'mass -errs', or in the IPA: ma-sœz.If you insist on using French words in your speech, at least make the effort to learn the correct pronunciation so you don't sound like a tit.
24 November 2010
Psychic news reporting
The Manchester Evening News has reported on an event which hasn't actually started yet. Perhaps it should report on its secret time-travelling device instead?
Crap TV
I keep seeing polls on various websites asking whom I think should win 'I'm a Celebrity' or Crap Factor.
There's always one option missing: 'I couldn't give a rat's arse because I wouldn't defile my television with that pile of crapola.'
Crap Factor is just karaoke, and "I'm a Celebrity' should be renamed 'I'm a Nobody Whose Career is Flagging so I'll Do Anything to Get on TV'.
22 November 2010
WEEE!
Why do retailers of 'white goods' always announce "and we'll even take away your old one for free!" as though it's some sort of special deal?
They're legally required to do this under the Waste Electrical and Electronic Equipment Directive.
They're legally required to do this under the Waste Electrical and Electronic Equipment Directive.
16 November 2010
Cleaning up other people's mess
On Saturday morning, I joined the Friends of Eatock Lodge in a litter-pick. The main things we retrieved were drinks cans, bread wrappers and bags full of dog crap.
So, if you're one of those who drinks in the park, why can't you chuck your cans in one of the five litterbins? There's one at each entrance to the lodge, so you can do it on your way home.
If you care enough to go to feed the ducks, why do you then leave the plastic wrapper behind? Ducks don't like eating plastic. Same as above - stick it in the bin!
As for those who leave bags of dog crap behind, you are just scum. Stick it in the bloody bin! Think about it, you brainless idiots! By bagging it and then chucking the bag in the bushes, you have turned something that would have washed away in a few days, into something which will take months to even begin biodegrading. It'd be better if you just chucked the crap into the bushes without bagging it, if you're too bone idle to put it in the bins which you have to walk past on your way out of the park anyway.
So, if you're one of those who drinks in the park, why can't you chuck your cans in one of the five litterbins? There's one at each entrance to the lodge, so you can do it on your way home.
If you care enough to go to feed the ducks, why do you then leave the plastic wrapper behind? Ducks don't like eating plastic. Same as above - stick it in the bin!
As for those who leave bags of dog crap behind, you are just scum. Stick it in the bloody bin! Think about it, you brainless idiots! By bagging it and then chucking the bag in the bushes, you have turned something that would have washed away in a few days, into something which will take months to even begin biodegrading. It'd be better if you just chucked the crap into the bushes without bagging it, if you're too bone idle to put it in the bins which you have to walk past on your way out of the park anyway.
13 November 2010
Oh just let me ride my bike!
OK, spur of the moment, I decided to go out on the bike, so I went to move the van, but it wouldn't start. After some messing I managed to shift it.
Then the boss rang, wanting train tickets booked. So I sorted that out and eventually got out on the bike and went for petrol, but the queues were horrendous, and the idiot in front of me decided to do her makeup before setting off. The pay at pump facility wasn't working and queue inside the kiosk was awful, and it eventually took me 15 mins to pay up and go.
Then I joined the queue for the air supply. The other people took ages and when it was eventually my turn, I discovered why - the compressor wasn't working properly and was on a go slow.
So, an hour after I set off, I have done a grand total of 7 miles and stopped for a drink. Buggerit.
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06 November 2010
Saturday live
One thing that drives me nuts every Saturday morning, is the opening to the Radio 4 programme 'Saturday Live'.
Apart from the pointless music intro, it's an audio montage of 2-second clips from items in the programme which is probably aimed at enthusing you about the contents. Well sorry, but all it makes me want to do is throw the radio through the window. It's the audio equivalent of puréeing a salad to make it look more tasty.
Oh how I miss John Peel and his 'Home Truths'.
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Apart from the pointless music intro, it's an audio montage of 2-second clips from items in the programme which is probably aimed at enthusing you about the contents. Well sorry, but all it makes me want to do is throw the radio through the window. It's the audio equivalent of puréeing a salad to make it look more tasty.
Oh how I miss John Peel and his 'Home Truths'.
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16 September 2010
Where does the time go?
Oh my blog, how I have neglected you. So many things to do and so little time in which to do them.
I've promised to do a car boot sale on Sunday, and have approximately 1 hour free over the next couple of days in which to sort out the stuff to take. I did try to set aside a couple of boxes a while ago, but never quite got around to filling them, so my house is still full of junk.
I've promised to do a car boot sale on Sunday, and have approximately 1 hour free over the next couple of days in which to sort out the stuff to take. I did try to set aside a couple of boxes a while ago, but never quite got around to filling them, so my house is still full of junk.
31 August 2010
A warning to those who have iPhones
At the weekend, my friend's iPhone was stolen from her tent whilst she slept. It would appear that hers was not the only one to go missing that night, we know of at least three others, and the thieves only took iPhones.
The Police told her that there is an application (app) which uses bluetooth to pinpoint the location of other iPhones, and that thieves are using it in order to steal them. In her case, the thieves have now bagged themselves a very expensive brick, because she had the phone blocked as soon as she discovered it was missing.
So, if you have an iPhone, turn off the bluetooth whenever you're not using it.
09 August 2010
I hate the milkman
Why did he swap his nice quiet electric milk float for the noisy horrible diesel thing that wakes up the whole street at 5.30am? Grrr.
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30 May 2010
Parents - grrrr!
Why is it that some parents think it's OK to allow their children to wander around in restaurants?
I'm sitting in a lovely Chinese restaurant and there's a family sitting at a nearby table, engrossed in conversation whilst their kids are walking around the other tables, annoying people.
When I was a child, I wasn't allowed to leave the table without permission and, even then, it was only to go to the loo.
These parents seem oblivious to the fact that their kids are elsewhere. It's not the kids who are ill-mannered, it's their parents.
I did supress a giggle when one of the kids was waving his arms around and smacked his elbow hard on a table, ran back to his parents who completely ignored him. Still, they've been ignoring him all evening, so why bother now? Poor kid.
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08 February 2010
Time to go back to basics?
My first car was a Vauxhall Chevette and I loved it. If anything went wrong, I could fix it myself. Under the bonnet, all the various bits were easily recognisable, you could get at everything without having to dismantle the entire vehicle and parts were readily available at a reasonable price.
Over the years, automotive technology has advanced to the point where when I lift the bonnet, I can see where the oil and coolant goes, but most of the other stuff is well-hidden and shoe-horned in to spaces that even a mouse would have difficulty accessing.
When I take my car to the garage for a service, they attach it to a computer, which tells them which bits need tweeking or replacing. The car has lots of clever electronic gazoobies which manage the engine and braking, and the throttle cable is a thing of the past. We now have all of these lovely things which make our cars 'better', even if they cost a small fortune to replace when they go wrong.
I always said that the more bits you add, the more there is to go wrong, and go wrong they do, and it's always expensive.
Today, Toyota has announced that it may be recalling 300,000 vehicles because of a problem with the anti-lock braking system, which appears not to work on icy or bumpy roads (that's the UK knackered then!). They've already recalled thousands because of a problem with sticking throttles.
Perhaps we need to go back to basics, get rid of the fancy devices and just give us something that works.
The first step should be to ensure that all of the bulbs can be replaced by the driver, at the roadside, with no tools and in under 2 minutes. I laughed at my friend when he eventually called the AA to change a headlamp, until I saw that you actually need to be a 4-stone contortionist to get at it. It took the AA man half an hour to do it. The next time a bulb went, my friend took the car to the garage where they put it on a ramp to change it. What a crap design!
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Over the years, automotive technology has advanced to the point where when I lift the bonnet, I can see where the oil and coolant goes, but most of the other stuff is well-hidden and shoe-horned in to spaces that even a mouse would have difficulty accessing.
When I take my car to the garage for a service, they attach it to a computer, which tells them which bits need tweeking or replacing. The car has lots of clever electronic gazoobies which manage the engine and braking, and the throttle cable is a thing of the past. We now have all of these lovely things which make our cars 'better', even if they cost a small fortune to replace when they go wrong.
I always said that the more bits you add, the more there is to go wrong, and go wrong they do, and it's always expensive.
Today, Toyota has announced that it may be recalling 300,000 vehicles because of a problem with the anti-lock braking system, which appears not to work on icy or bumpy roads (that's the UK knackered then!). They've already recalled thousands because of a problem with sticking throttles.
Perhaps we need to go back to basics, get rid of the fancy devices and just give us something that works.
The first step should be to ensure that all of the bulbs can be replaced by the driver, at the roadside, with no tools and in under 2 minutes. I laughed at my friend when he eventually called the AA to change a headlamp, until I saw that you actually need to be a 4-stone contortionist to get at it. It took the AA man half an hour to do it. The next time a bulb went, my friend took the car to the garage where they put it on a ramp to change it. What a crap design!
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Time to go back to basics?
My first car was a Vauxhall Chevette and I loved it. If anything went wrong, I could fix it myself. Under the bonnet, all the various bits were easily recognisable, you could get at everything without having to dismantle the entire vehicle and parts were readily available at a reasonable price.
Over the years, automotive technology has advanced to the point where when I lift the bonnet, I can see where the oil and coolant goes, but most of the other stuff is well-hidden and shoe-horned in to spaces that even a mouse would have difficulty accessing.
When I take my car to the garage for a service, they attach it to a computer, which tells them which bits need tweeking or replacing. The car has lots of clever electronic gazoobies which manage the engine and breaking, and the throttle cable is a thing of the past. We now have all of these lovely things which make our cars 'better', even if they cost a small fortune to replace when they go wrong.
I always said that the more bits you add, the more there is to go wrong, and go wrong they do, and it's always expensive.
Today, Toyota has announced that it may be recalling 300,000 vehicles because of a problem with the anti-lock braking system, which appears not to work on icy or bumpy roads (that's the UK knackered then!). They've already recalled thousands because of a problem with sticking throttles.
Perhaps we need to go back to basics, get rid of the fancy devices and just give us something that works.
The first step should be to ensure that all of the bulbs can be replaced by the driver, at the roadside, with no tools and in under 2 minutes. I laughed at my friend when he eventually called the AA to change a headlamp, until I saw that you actually need to be a 4-stone contortionist to get at it. It took the AA man half an hour to do it. The next time a bulb went, my friend took the car to the garage where they put it on a ramp to change it. What a crap design!
------------------
Over the years, automotive technology has advanced to the point where when I lift the bonnet, I can see where the oil and coolant goes, but most of the other stuff is well-hidden and shoe-horned in to spaces that even a mouse would have difficulty accessing.
When I take my car to the garage for a service, they attach it to a computer, which tells them which bits need tweeking or replacing. The car has lots of clever electronic gazoobies which manage the engine and breaking, and the throttle cable is a thing of the past. We now have all of these lovely things which make our cars 'better', even if they cost a small fortune to replace when they go wrong.
I always said that the more bits you add, the more there is to go wrong, and go wrong they do, and it's always expensive.
Today, Toyota has announced that it may be recalling 300,000 vehicles because of a problem with the anti-lock braking system, which appears not to work on icy or bumpy roads (that's the UK knackered then!). They've already recalled thousands because of a problem with sticking throttles.
Perhaps we need to go back to basics, get rid of the fancy devices and just give us something that works.
The first step should be to ensure that all of the bulbs can be replaced by the driver, at the roadside, with no tools and in under 2 minutes. I laughed at my friend when he eventually called the AA to change a headlamp, until I saw that you actually need to be a 4-stone contortionist to get at it. It took the AA man half an hour to do it. The next time a bulb went, my friend took the car to the garage where they put it on a ramp to change it. What a crap design!
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02 January 2010
I don't believe it!
It seems that Ridley Scott is making a new Robin Hood film. So that will be the 16th remake. Can't these Directors come up with something original? Obviously not, otherwise they'd stop ripping off other people's films.
Think up something new, you lazy buggers!
Think up something new, you lazy buggers!
Sore finger
On Monday and Tuesday, my index finger was itching enough to drive me to distraction. I ended up biting it, to try to stop it. On Wednesday it hurt like hell. Since Thursday, every time I've touched something cold, my finger has gone blue or white. The tip of that finger is cold whilst the rest of my digits are warm, and it's really doing my head in now.
Anyone got any idea what's going on?
Anyone got any idea what's going on?
04 November 2009
02 November 2009
Sorry, until the next time.
I can believe what I just heard on the news. Arsene Wenger believes that disgraced footballer Marlon King should be given a second chance and be permitted to continue his career after he has served his prison sentence for assaulting a woman in a nightclub, as long as he's sorry for what he did.
Second chance? Doesn't he mean 14th chance? Given that he has 13 previous convictions, including one for violence against women, I suspect the only thing he'll be sorry about is any potential loss of income. It's his wife and kids that I feel sorry for.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/sport/football/premier_league/wigan/article6897462.ece
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29 September 2009
The rising cost of food
I very rarely shop for food in the supermarkets because my local market is superb in terms of range, quality and value for money.
However, the other day, I decided that, seeing as I was going into the supermarket for soap powder, I may as well buy the food for that day's tea in there too. When I got to the checkout, I nearly had a heart-attack at the cost. £28 for just a couple of items! Now I could understand it if I'd bought luxury items, but I hadn't - just bog-standard ordinary stuff (and no alcohol). The cost of one night's meal was more than I'd normally spend for a week's worth of food on the market.
It made me think about what we buy, where we buy it and why. I receive e-newsletters from a couple of supermarkets, and I looked at the items on 'special offer'. Let's compare some prices:
A 1kg (2.2lbs) bag of potatoes for £1.29 in the supermarket. On the market, it's less than £1 for 5lbs of the same spuds - double the amount.
Mushrooms for nearly £1.50 for ¼lb, when it's about £1.10p for 1lb on the market.
I can buy a week's worth of veg on the market for about £7, and my weekly shop includes potatoes, onions, carrots, mushrooms, cauliflower, broccoli, garlic, celery, peppers, swede and, in winter, 1lb of 'pot herbs' (mixed chopped veg suitable for stews), because I'm lazy. For a further £1, I can buy 6 apples on the market. There's no way that I could get so much good quality food for so little cost in the supermarket.
Then there's the meat. 2 lamb loin chops in the supermarket for £3.84, yet I can get 4 for a fiver on the market. Nearly £7 for 5 chicken breasts in the supermarket (£1.40 each), yet I bought 26 chicken breasts for £20 on the market (77p each). Last week I bought 2 fresh tuna steaks, 2 salmon fillet pieces and 2 large bass for less than a tenner. In the supermarket, it's nearly twice that.
Not only is our local market good value for money, but the range of fresh products is far superior to any of the supermarkets.
I'm not just picking on one supermarket either, within close distance of my home and workplace, there's Aldi, Lidl, Tesco, Morrisons, Asda and Sainsbury's, and I've shopped in all of them at one time or another.
So, why do people choose to shop in supermarkets? Well, some people don't have a high quality local market within easy reach of their homes, but many do and simply can't be bothered to go and have a look. They'd rather drive to the big supermarket, buy all of their week's shopping in one place and pay through the nose for the priviledge. The annoying thing is, they'll probably chuck half of it away because they buy too much and then don't eat it until its 'poisonous on' date.
However, the other day, I decided that, seeing as I was going into the supermarket for soap powder, I may as well buy the food for that day's tea in there too. When I got to the checkout, I nearly had a heart-attack at the cost. £28 for just a couple of items! Now I could understand it if I'd bought luxury items, but I hadn't - just bog-standard ordinary stuff (and no alcohol). The cost of one night's meal was more than I'd normally spend for a week's worth of food on the market.
It made me think about what we buy, where we buy it and why. I receive e-newsletters from a couple of supermarkets, and I looked at the items on 'special offer'. Let's compare some prices:
A 1kg (2.2lbs) bag of potatoes for £1.29 in the supermarket. On the market, it's less than £1 for 5lbs of the same spuds - double the amount.
Mushrooms for nearly £1.50 for ¼lb, when it's about £1.10p for 1lb on the market.
I can buy a week's worth of veg on the market for about £7, and my weekly shop includes potatoes, onions, carrots, mushrooms, cauliflower, broccoli, garlic, celery, peppers, swede and, in winter, 1lb of 'pot herbs' (mixed chopped veg suitable for stews), because I'm lazy. For a further £1, I can buy 6 apples on the market. There's no way that I could get so much good quality food for so little cost in the supermarket.
Then there's the meat. 2 lamb loin chops in the supermarket for £3.84, yet I can get 4 for a fiver on the market. Nearly £7 for 5 chicken breasts in the supermarket (£1.40 each), yet I bought 26 chicken breasts for £20 on the market (77p each). Last week I bought 2 fresh tuna steaks, 2 salmon fillet pieces and 2 large bass for less than a tenner. In the supermarket, it's nearly twice that.
Not only is our local market good value for money, but the range of fresh products is far superior to any of the supermarkets.
I'm not just picking on one supermarket either, within close distance of my home and workplace, there's Aldi, Lidl, Tesco, Morrisons, Asda and Sainsbury's, and I've shopped in all of them at one time or another.
So, why do people choose to shop in supermarkets? Well, some people don't have a high quality local market within easy reach of their homes, but many do and simply can't be bothered to go and have a look. They'd rather drive to the big supermarket, buy all of their week's shopping in one place and pay through the nose for the priviledge. The annoying thing is, they'll probably chuck half of it away because they buy too much and then don't eat it until its 'poisonous on' date.
05 July 2009
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